Jet Li walked into a pub in New York with his pal. He says to his pal: “Hey! That’s Steven Spielberg over there! God, I wish he’ll come over to say “hi”.
Spielberg suddenly walked over and gave the man a punch on the nose.
Li : “Hey!! What that’s for?!”
Spielberg : “You bloody Japanese killed my granddad when you
bombed Pearl Harbour!”
Li : “I’m not Japanese! I’m Chinese!”
Spielberg : “Chinese, Vietnamese, Japanese, you’re all the same!”
Spielberg walks back to the other side. Then Jet Li calmly walks over to Spielberg and gives him a really heavy punch on the face.
Spielberg : “Hey! What that’s for….. !?!”
Li : “YOU BLOODY ASSHOLE! YOU SANK THE TITANIC!”
Spielberg : “No, I didn’t, an iceberg sank the Titanic!”
Li : “Iceberg, Carlsberg, Spielberg, you’re all the same!”
Source : http://kahkahkah.mnazman.com
FART
I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and noticed that everybody was staring at me....
Source : http://www.jokes-best.com/
WORMS AND ALCOHOL
Will was trying to to teach his son the evils of alcohol.
He put a worm in a glass of water & another in a glass of whiskey.
The worm in the water lived while the one in the whiskey curled up & d*ed.
"All right, son," Said Will, "what does that show you?"
"Well dad, it shows that if you drink alcohol you will not have worms."
Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
Source : http://www.jokes-best.com/
A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race appear?"
The mother answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made.."
Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.. The father answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved."
The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?"
The mother answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."
DRUNK
"I am going to give you two tickets. One because you were speeding and one because you didn't have your seat belt fastened." The man said, "I did too have my seat belt fastened. I just loosened it when you came up to the car. The Patrol Man said to the man\'s wife, "I know he didn't have his seatbelt fastened. Isn't that right, lady?" She replied,
"Well, officer. I learned a long time ago not to argue with my husband when he's drunk."
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